I'm due at the office in 2 week's time. That's 2 months and 2 weeks of leave. I know that being a part from my son is nerve wrecking and heart breaking, but in a weird way i miss working. I miss my lunchmates the most haha. I will just have to admit i am not a stay at home mother material. Well it is nice to have a long break, but to make it permanent..that's just not me.
Alhamdulillah taking care of my baby has been a wonderful experience, i am happy to admit i can care for him single handedly, even bath him singlehandedly thanks to some mothercare sponge-gadget thingy. Although it can be very tiring!
But my son will just have to learn that i will not be able to be there for him 24-7. Thanks to a supportive famly, i will be in the routine of sending the baby and the maid daily to Ibu n daddy nursery on weekdays.
Loads to prepare- time to select clothes that can actually fit now, and organise daily activities so that we dont go haywire when 8 March comes!
Friday, February 19, 2010
A mother's heart
Being a new mother, there is so much to talk about. Endless. But basically i know every mom wants the best for their child. It's an overwhelming feeling when you just want your baby to eat the best food, use the best products, learn from the best and is cared for by just the best people around.
These days i find that i put my son's interest above and beyond mine. well that's cliche. But the process of it is interesting, when my heart aches every time i hear him cry (loud), or my heart melts when he gurgles and coos. Or when i spend all my money on him. It's funny that all of this is happening like an automatic response to what life has to offer. Never in my life have i ever cared loved or protect another being, the way i do now. God is Great, and a mother's heart is so fragile.
Sometimes i reflect this on thinking, that was how my parents felt when they raised us. Raising children can be utterly heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.
My son, my life!
These days i find that i put my son's interest above and beyond mine. well that's cliche. But the process of it is interesting, when my heart aches every time i hear him cry (loud), or my heart melts when he gurgles and coos. Or when i spend all my money on him. It's funny that all of this is happening like an automatic response to what life has to offer. Never in my life have i ever cared loved or protect another being, the way i do now. God is Great, and a mother's heart is so fragile.
Sometimes i reflect this on thinking, that was how my parents felt when they raised us. Raising children can be utterly heartbreaking and heartwarming at the same time.
My son, my life!
Breastfeeding
Bf can be quite an exasperating experience. There are good days, and low days. I have only been able to exclusively bf my son for one month; after that...and even after reading so much about perseverance to bf..we started to supplement him on Mamex Gold. Of course i still continue pumping and bf. It was mixed feelings at first, i most sympathize him cos we all know bf milk is still no.1. but at the the same time i feel a sense of relief, at least my baby boy will go to sleep feeling 'kenyang' and wont wake up every half an hour for some ne-nen.
But overall, i think it's a mother's choice as to what she wants to feed her child.
I hope to bf Luqman for as long as i can, to provide him with the nutritions breastmilk can provide..and also because it creates a great bond between me and him.
When i put him close to me, to my breast and he sucks well, i feel that i am his sense of relief, sense of belonging, completeness. Like i am the answer to all his troubles, the cure to all his miseries; it's a world created with just the 2 of us in it, clutching each other tight in our arms. And there is no feeling in this world better than that.
Mommy loves you baby!
But overall, i think it's a mother's choice as to what she wants to feed her child.
I hope to bf Luqman for as long as i can, to provide him with the nutritions breastmilk can provide..and also because it creates a great bond between me and him.
When i put him close to me, to my breast and he sucks well, i feel that i am his sense of relief, sense of belonging, completeness. Like i am the answer to all his troubles, the cure to all his miseries; it's a world created with just the 2 of us in it, clutching each other tight in our arms. And there is no feeling in this world better than that.
Mommy loves you baby!
Friday, February 12, 2010
Bee is for Baby
A friend recommended this organic product, and i love it! Good for baby's skin, good for me! Available in Singapore.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
Names
Since i have not started working yet, and ive not been reading much except for baby books (which i can open a library soon!), so the blog is gonna be all Luqmanism..hehe.
Somebody came to me and asked how we came up with Luq's name. Someone even commented, she thot i would have an ultra modern name for my child like Daniel or something (LOL it's not even that modern!).
Actually it was very easy. I found Luqman's name in the Quran, as i was reading it one nite. I read the surah many many times throughout my pregnancy, and as i read the interpretations of Surah Luqman, it captured me that the name is a good name for our son. There are many stories behind the name. I love it, it's simple short and meaningful. All my children will have short names. F has started calling Luq even when in utero. When Luq was born, the name suits him perfectly, with an addition of Muhammad in front.
i believe that children should be given nice, meaningful names. In a way i feel it's easier to name boys than girls, but then again i could be prejudiced :p
I believe that when you give a good name to a child, every time we call the child it's like a doa to the child. I pray that my baby Luqman will grow up and become a good man, just like his name :p
Somebody came to me and asked how we came up with Luq's name. Someone even commented, she thot i would have an ultra modern name for my child like Daniel or something (LOL it's not even that modern!).
Actually it was very easy. I found Luqman's name in the Quran, as i was reading it one nite. I read the surah many many times throughout my pregnancy, and as i read the interpretations of Surah Luqman, it captured me that the name is a good name for our son. There are many stories behind the name. I love it, it's simple short and meaningful. All my children will have short names. F has started calling Luq even when in utero. When Luq was born, the name suits him perfectly, with an addition of Muhammad in front.
i believe that children should be given nice, meaningful names. In a way i feel it's easier to name boys than girls, but then again i could be prejudiced :p
I believe that when you give a good name to a child, every time we call the child it's like a doa to the child. I pray that my baby Luqman will grow up and become a good man, just like his name :p
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
2 or 3 months?
I am entitled to 2 months' maternity leave, which will approximately end 22nd Feb. Since we were at the hospital in the beginning for so many days, this stay at home leave feels really short. Soon i will be ending my pantang, and we will move back to our lil apartment and start life there.
F has been telling me to take an xtra one month's unpaid leave to spend more time with Luq. Since i cleared and vacated my cases up till mid march, and Luq came early, i guess that is nt such a bad idea. It's not that there is so much to cover from Feb to March.
Hmm still mulling over it. I do feel guilty leaving work for another month altho i do have very reliable and nice colleagues...hmm dont miss office life that much...hmmm would Loveee to spend Luq's 3rd month just taking him for walks...maybe just settling him down before i start full time work again. This would be the only time i can really see him grow and be with him 24-7.
Should i?
Monday, January 18, 2010
And so he speaks!
Yesterday i realised Luqman has started to make sounds. Cooing they call it. I speak to him in a parentese pattern. oooohhh whattt is mommyyy's babbby doingggggg? who smellssss goodd?????
It's so wonderful when he is in this good-cooing mood! Cute!
It's so wonderful when he is in this good-cooing mood! Cute!
Feeding the hungry
YES..this is becoming a baby blog but so what. hehe. Everybody talks about their child no matter who listens.
Anyway, the nite i delivered Luq he latched on straight away. He sucked..cup cup..i thot it was a miracle! Cos i read so much abt people having trouble with their babies latching on. i even took a photo but i'm not gonna post it here :p
Anyway at the hospital (we were there for 10 days) Luq was diagnosed with breastfeeding jaundice. In simple terms, i was not producing enough milk for him. The doctor advised me to supplement him with formula milk, which i did, and he loved. Although then he didnt smell as good as a complete breastfed baby. But i was happy that he was full and had a goodnite's sleep.
When we came home my mother was not too happy with the formula milk, saying i should keep on breastfeeding Luq and my milk will come. Plus Luq was only 12 days old. We have stopped the formula milk, and maybe restart when i am going back to work. I did read somewhere that one' milk supply will suit one's baby.
Which is rather confusing because some people's milk are over abundant. Like they have to pump several times. But when i tried pumping it was just like half and ounce which is not worth pumping, might as well give it straight to Luq who's almost all the time been hanging on my breasts!
Hmm confused mother and milk producer. Please advise.
Anyway, the nite i delivered Luq he latched on straight away. He sucked..cup cup..i thot it was a miracle! Cos i read so much abt people having trouble with their babies latching on. i even took a photo but i'm not gonna post it here :p
Anyway at the hospital (we were there for 10 days) Luq was diagnosed with breastfeeding jaundice. In simple terms, i was not producing enough milk for him. The doctor advised me to supplement him with formula milk, which i did, and he loved. Although then he didnt smell as good as a complete breastfed baby. But i was happy that he was full and had a goodnite's sleep.
When we came home my mother was not too happy with the formula milk, saying i should keep on breastfeeding Luq and my milk will come. Plus Luq was only 12 days old. We have stopped the formula milk, and maybe restart when i am going back to work. I did read somewhere that one' milk supply will suit one's baby.
Which is rather confusing because some people's milk are over abundant. Like they have to pump several times. But when i tried pumping it was just like half and ounce which is not worth pumping, might as well give it straight to Luq who's almost all the time been hanging on my breasts!
Hmm confused mother and milk producer. Please advise.
25 days with Luqman
.jpg)
Today marks Luq's 25th day with us. 25 days for me as a mother. 25 days of the Parent Team. 25 days of not so strict pantang.hehe..btw..Ibu cooked chicken rice with baked chicken for me today. super yummy folks!
Anyway, been wanting to write but my baby baby baby was soo in the way. Motherhood is great. Actually the word 'mother' itself is so under rated. The things we mothers do for our children is seriously out of this world.
Luqman has been such a darling all these 25 days. He hasnt cried unnecessarily (thank God!) . i kinda know his screams now signals: I need food, or i need a diaper change (like NOW! PRONTO!), i hate taking baths (just like the Abah? haha) or i need a cuddle now! (yes i am a boy but i soo need a cuddle!)
I am fortunate to have a great family throughout my pantang. Whenever i need to do other stuff than handling the baby ie. bath, rest, sleep, eat..etc..i can put Luq in the hands of his nenek or abah. So there is some help all the time and i am not left all alone with a confused crying child.
So there is sooo much to look forward to in 2010. I didnt seem to prepare any resolutions (thanks to Luq who messed up my new year plans hehhe)...but this year we are goin to:
1) January- celebrate Luqman's 1 month old!
2) February- Mommy's end of pantang and Abah has promised some shopping and a weekend getaway just the Parent Team and Luq!
3) March- Mommy's 29th birthday and going back to work...eeek! also Kakwa's baby is due!
4) May- Abah's birthday and Mother's day!
5) June- Our 3rd wedding annivesarry
6) July- Father's day :p
7) August, September , October, November- birthdays, puasa and raya!
8) December- Luqman 1 year old..wonder what he will look like?
Thursday, January 14, 2010
My one true thing, 25.12.2009
37 weeks and 4 days. 25th December 2009. I gave birth to a beautiful baby son through c-sect at PPUM, at 7.03pm. Alhamdulillah, the emergency operation went well and Muhammad Luqman was one tiny baby at just 2.6kg but had the cutest face ive ever seen. Of course every mother says that, but my lil bundle of joy was really really cute and strong, and had the loudest voice in the OT!
A few minutes after the operation the nurse held Luqman in her arms, brought him to me, showed to me that he was a boy..and i kissed him ..i tried to brreastfeed him but he cried...he was very very fair...almost perfect..it was a MOMENT for us.
It was a complete shock when my water broke at midnite; i hastily thot THIS was really early. Gosh i havent even shopped for maternity bras! Daddy and Ibu drove us to the hospital at midnite, and the rest was history!
Today baby boy, you are 25 days old. Such a short presence in Mommy & Abah's life; but you are the most important thing in our lives now and forever!
We stayed 3 days at the hospital due to my c-sect; and those lonely nites my son and i held arms together, just becoming close companies to each other. I shall never forget on the second nite when i nursed him so much till he fell asleep, so tired myself the nurse took him away to let me rest. I woke up suddenly at 5am and rushed to get my poor son, looking at his face i knew he was crying cos he pooped and needed a cuddle.
Don't worry baby, Mommy will always always be here for you. Welcome to the world my precious son!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)